Author name: Devora Samet

(2-minute read) Staying Connected with Your Tween or Teen: More Ways to Strengthen Your Bond In last week’s post, we explored the importance of truly listening to our tweens and teens—without judgment—rather than jumping in to preach, advise, or correct. This week, let’s dive into additional strategies. Step #2: Validate and Acknowledge Their Perspective Validation doesn’t mean […]

(2-minute read) Staying Connected with Your Tween or Teen: Building a Relationship Through Everyday Conversations Hi Devora, I wonder if there are others like me who would be interested in hearing more about this age group of “tweens”…as teenagers seem to be getting younger and younger! How can we get them to still accept hugs

(2-minute read) The Power of Enforceables: Teaching Responsibility Through Setting Limits I recently evaluated a 12-year-old boy struggling with school refusal, anxiety, defiance, and chutzpah (blatant disrespect), alongside behavioral issues at home. At first, I was perplexed—he seemed like a typical, clean, articulate, put-together child, and his family appeared loving and stable. His sisters were

(1.5-minute read) Turning Sore Losers into Good Sports:Using Rewards to Build Positive Habits When I teach kids red and green behaviors, such as being a sport instead of a sore loser, I define a red response to losing as yelling, pouting, throwing things, or quitting mid-game. A green response, on the other hand, includes staying

(3-minute read) What to Do When a Toddler Hits Their Baby Sibling In one of my recent workshops, I discussed a common challenge: when a two-and-a-half year old toddler hurts their new 4-month-old baby sibling. Managing this behavior can be tricky because the toddler is still very young and requires a great deal of compassion.

(1-minute read) Do I Love My Child More Because I Do Things For Her? As parents, we often find ourselves wondering if doing things for our child is the ultimate act of love. When a 5-year-old begs to be fed, a 7-year-old wants you to dress him every morning, or a 10-year-old says, “I don’t

(1-minute read) What’s It Like Inside Dr. Devora Samet’s Social Skills Course? Lessons, Laughter, and Life Skills Hi. My name is Chaya and I’m just finishing up a course on “How to Teach Social Skills” by Dr. Devora Samet. Let me tell you a little about it. The class is set up nicely for the

(1-minute read) When That Little Voice In Your Head Is Telling You To Do Red… One of the most eye-opening lessons I learned in a DBT course during graduate school was the concept of urges. An urge is like a little voice in your head telling you what to do. For children—and even many adults—this

(1.5-minute read) Over the years, I’ve worked with many children who struggled to manage frustration and strong feelings. Instead of asking for what they needed, they “acted out” their emotions—spilling snack cabinets when they didn’t get the snack they wanted, ripping cards when they lost a game, or even lashing out physically when someone accidentally

(2-minute read) A recent session with one of my students brought to life a principle from the book How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish: “Until the bad feelings come out, the good feelings can’t go in.” Last year, one of my high school students struggled