Yes, Pesach is coming… In fact, it’s less than two weeks away. Ouch, did that bring up lots of feelings???
We’ve established that feelings need to be discharged in order to avoid emotional explosions, but how do we actually do it? There are lots of different ways to do it. Here is one super simple strategy!
Shall we use Pesach as an example? Who does NOT have lots of emotions about this yomtov?
Strategy #1: The Emotion Web
I write or draw the event (Pesach) in the center. I then elicit from the child all the different emotions that might be triggered by that event and write them down all around it, making sure to leave space to also write the reasons for the feelings.
Two Quick Tips:
- Some kids will deny negative emotions as if they are supposed to only feel positive emotions at certain times in their lives. Model for them by sharing with them that you also have negative emotions at these times. How? Share with them the negative emotions you have and why. (see the web above for some examples)
- Keep validating kids when they bring up different emotions and do not argue with them that they shouldn’t have certain emotions, or reprimand them for being ungrateful. ALL EMOTIONS ARE OK AND VALID. Instead, make space for all their honest emotions! Let’s not kid ourselves… It’s not so easy to be honest with our emotions.
Sometimes we are surprised to learn how our kids really feel about certain things in their lives. It’s a gift when they feel safe enough to share.